An element you’ll see in almost every hard conversation is forgiving and apologizing. When there’s tension, an offense, or a disagreement, the best approach to having a good conversation and win relationally, is to go first in forgiving and apologizing. We’ve all been there, we’re in a conversation and it gets tense because we’re trying to prove to the other person why THEY need to forgive or apologize to us – BUT, in any hard conversation, you have something that you can apologize for. Maybe it’s things like apologizing for not being communicating clearly or for making an assumption; and when you do, it automatically lowers the guard of the person you are talking to. And I’m not saying to do this as a way to just move the conversation along, as leaders, we need to put aside our pride or the desire to being right in order to own our part so that we can restore the relationship. And, if you are going into the conversation with an offense in your heart, and you know you need to forgive, do as much as you can on the front end. It’s okay to not be fully there, but as long as your desire for the conversation is for both of you to get to a place of forgiveness, then you have higher chance of that conversation going well. Romans 12:18 “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” As followers of Jesus we are commanded to forgive and apologize and to be peace makers. So, let me ask you, why is that not typically our first reaction? The as far as it depends on you, that’s the part we own as leaders, we go first in forgiving and apologizing, no matter what the other person decides to do. Remember, hard conversations are invitations for freedom, for you and for them.